Dave Chappelle’s ‘SNL’ monologue: Good luck to Trump

dave chappelle took the stage at Studio 8H for the New Year’s inaugural episodeSaturday night Live,” he hosted the show for the fourth time.

He came on stage wearing a suit and smoking a cigarette and said, “Boy, let me tell you something. I am very honest. I am in quite a dilemma tonight. And it started in October. Lorne Michaels called me.

Chappelle explained how he had asked her to host the show. “The first episode after the election,” Chappelle recalls. “And I was like, no, I’m good.” He explains how he told Michaels, “Save the date closest to January 6th. You know what?” I can get rid of all these old Trump jokes. I’ll do it!” The comedian paused, adding, “The moment I said yes, L.A. went up in flames!”

Chappelle, who is known for controversial jokes, including jokes about trans people, said, “I’m tired of being controversial. I’m trying to turn over a new leaf. It’s too early to try to joke about such a disaster. It’s close to home.”

Chappelle named actors he worked with, like Dennis Quaid, who have been affected by the ongoing fires in LA. Chappelle said, “It broke my heart.” He took note of all the negative comments online about celebrities losing their houses. “You see it right there? That’s why I hate poor people,” Chappelle said, laughing. “Because they can’t see beyond their pain.”

“On the news the other day, they said this fire was the costliest tragedy ever to happen in the history of the United States. I think it’s because people in LA have nice things. Chappell said, I can burn 40,000 acres of land in Mississippi for six or seven dollars. They also speculated on various conspiracy theories about how the fire started. “If you were a rational-thinking person, you would have to at least consider the possibility that God hates these people,” Chappelle joked.

Sitting on a stool and smoking, Chappell added, “A lot of poor people were affected, too. Many of these people found out within the week of the fire that they had lost their fire insurance. Luigi said, ‘You’re welcome.'” Speaking of Luigi Mangione, he said, “That kid planned almost the perfect crime. The only thing he forgot was to shave his eyebrows.”

Chappelle, who lives in Ohio, spoke about Donald Trump’s comments about Haitians last year in Springfield, Ohio. “Trump is a wild man. He said that Haitians in Springfield, Ohio were eating people’s dogs and cats. I live a town over from Springfield. That just didn’t happen in Springfield.” Chappelle shared how he wanted to show his support after those comments. “Every day I would drive to Springfield and eat lunch at a Haitian restaurant.” He paused, “And to be honest, I don’t know what that meat was. But whatever it was, it fell straight off the bone.

“It’s no fun being famous anymore,” said the comic, who compared being famous to storming the beaches of Normandy and losing comrades in battle. He talked about the allegations involving “Puffy” and Diddy. “A lot of my friends ask me, they say, Dave, do you know anything about those Freak Off parties (held by Didi)?” Chappell smiled.

Later, she said she wasn’t invited to parties because, “Oh my God, I’m ugly! That’s a hard way to find out.” He added, “Can you imagine if I were you, I read the newspaper and you find out: Everyone in Hollywood fucked up behind your back?”

Noting Donald Trump’s inauguration on Monday, Chappelle said, “Here’s the thing: On Monday, Donald Trump is coming back. it’s going to be 47th chairman. All flags are at half-staff because of the death of Jimmy Carter.” Chappelle then told a story about seeing a photo of Carter with people cheering for the former president in Palestine and said, “This photo Brought tears to my eyes.”

Chappelle said that although he was not convinced that Carter was a good president, “He was a good man. It made me proud to see that.”

Concluding the unusually long monologue, Chappelle said, “The presidency is no place for little people. Donald Trump, I know you watch the show, man, remember whether people voted for you or not, they’re all counting on you.

Wishing Trump all the best, he said, “The whole world is counting on you.” Please do better next time.” Packing an emotional punch, Chappelle concluded, “Don’t forget your humanity for displaced people, whether they’re in the Palisades or Palestine.”

Watch his monologue below:

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